And with that, it all makes sense. While Felix would never admit it, it's clear that that's all he's ever wanted. To have something for himself, be his own person. He's always tried to claw his way out from Glenn, Rodrigue, and even Dimitri's own shadow.
Dimitri drops the other's wrist and his own hand falls to his side.] I understand. Again, I apologize. I'll leave.
[ Oh, if only Dimitri knew how soothing his kisses can actually be sometimes. Maybe he does know. Maybe that's why he kissed him like that, and leaves his heart feeling just a tiny bit less heavy.
Felix nods quietly ] Fine. ... I'll see you soon. [ and waits for Dimitri to take his leave and for silence to overtake the training hall before picking up where he left off in his routine. The rhythm feels all wrong and his mind keeps wandering further and further with each pirouette, but even if it's just practice, even if it's for himself, he's not leaving this unfinished.
Around half an hour later, he keeps to his word and knocks on the door to Dimitri's bedroom. ] Open up. [ He's still in the dancer outfit (if he's staying the night in his room, he can just borrow his clothes. it wouldn't be the first time he's done that.) but he has a long cloak wrapped around his body to hide most of it, and to keep him warm. ]
[Dimitri opens the door and immediately bristles, torn between fussing because that can’t be the warmest even with the cloak, and staring at the peek of the dancer outfit Felix is still clearly wearing underneath the cloak. What he ends up on is a weird combination. 70% fussing, 30% get inside so I can look at you more.] Oh, I thought you would have changed. [A comment made without really thinking, but Dimitri quickly recovers.]
Get inside; the fireplace is already going. [He moves aside for Felix. When Felix is safe inside, he starts pulling blankets from his bed so they can cozy up by the fire.]
[ While he's not the most receptive to fussing (calm down dimitri he's fine, his toes are just really cold), sitting in front of a warm fire sounds appealing. So he shrugs off his cloak and accepts a blanket wound around him as a replacement. ]
It was easier to come straight here. [ He also didn't want to keep Dimitri waiting too long.
Watching the fire dance before his eyes, he takes a seat on the couch (and leaves plenty of room for Dimitri to settle next to him). ] Listen. I want to apologize for before. When I got mad at you, I let my emotions get the better of me. [ It's not always easy for him to say sorry, but he at least recognizes when he should. ]
[At least Dimitri can only fuss so much. He barely knows how to take care of himself anymore, let alone other people.
Regardless... He takes his place next to Felix without a word and follows suit in wrapping himself in blankets. After Felix has his say, Dimitri lays his hand atop Felix’s smaller one.]
Thank you. But I think your anger was justified. I lingered - [No, that’s not it.] watched you for far too long. [He rubs his index finger over Felix’s knuckle and down the knobby slope of his thumb, willing some warmth into their hands.] You rarely do anything without purpose, so if you went out of your way to do something alone I should have known better and respected that.
[ Felix drops his head on Dimitri's shoulder and murmurs, barely audible over the crackle of the fire ] ... Thanks. [ Because he's right - he was purposeful in everything about that dance practice, particularly the being alone part.
He turns his hand beneath Dimitri's, letting their fingers lace together naturally. ] At least it was you who saw, not one of the others. [ He can still look Dimitri in the eye, which is more than he could say if it were anyone else. ]
[This moment: them together by the fire, hand in hand, and an understanding between them, is perfect. Dimitri never realized how much he wanted this. How he should have longed for this instead of only revenge.]
I - we can make sure it stays that way. [We, not I, because Dimitri is not possessive. No. Of course he isn't.] I suppose your quarters are too small to dance in; that's why you went to the training grounds, yes? We must have an empty room here that can be set up for you...
[Or.] Or, you could dance here. [If the furniture is pushed out of the way, the lounge space connected to Dimitri's bedroom (where they are now) should be sufficient.] I would leave you be, of course. You need only say the word.
[ Felix blinks. Unsurprisingly, he's spot on with his assumptions, but... ]
Are you sure? [ Yes, they're together, and Dimitri is infuriatingly kind-hearted sometimes, but something about his offer makes his heart squeeze in his chest. ]
[ It's partly out of concern - rude as he is, Felix recognizes that kicking someone out of their personal space for his own selfish reasons is, in fact, rude with a capital R. But more than that, it's because he feels... well, a lot. Happy, understood, loved. He's not blind to Dimitri's affection (far from it) but moments like this still catch him off guard.
He squeezes his hand and takes a slow, deep breath. ] I'll take you up on that. [ Though Dimitri can't see it from this angle, Felix smiles, warmth tickling his cheeks. ] Thank you, Dimitri.
[Hff, that thanks is in no way necessary but Dimitri keeps his mouth shut.] I love you, Felix.
[A comfortable silence falls over them then. Dimitri can only just hear Felix’s quiet breathing over the crackle of the fire. In a perfect world, Dimitri would be able to fall asleep like this. Unfortunately sleep still alludes him even when he’s at his most relaxed, as he is now. It might have something to do with how he can still see just a peek of Felix’s dancer outfit underneath all their blankets. The collar is very much visible, it leads Dimitri’s eye down to Felix’s collarbone. He can feel his bare legs against his own.]
May I make a request? [He breaks the silence.] May I see you? N-not dance. [He clarifies quickly.] I just want to get a good look at you.. in the outfit.
[ (he doesn't say those three little words back, but during their silence, he tucks himself against him in a way that communicates that same feeling in return.)
Felix lets out a small huff, but he lifts himself from Dimitri's shoulder without a protest. ] Fine. I suppose I can let you see it. [ He releases Dimitri's hand and leaves the blankets on the couch as he steps in front of him. With the heat of the fire at his back, he rests his hands on his hips and looks off to the side. ] Just don't take too long - this isn't very warm, you know. [ If that wasn't obvious from how much lean, muscular skin's exposed right now. ]
[Felix says that as if he doesn't know how Dimitri wants to drink in every inch of him; commit him entirely to memory. The strain of Felix's skin under the outfits collar and arm braces, the tightness contrasting how loose the rest of the outfit is, the lines of muscle that flex with every move Felix makes.] Goddess, you are gorgeous...
[Dimitri's eye is still drawn to Felix's legs though. His legs pull him in like a magnet. And Dimitri has always really liked Felix's legs (the man is small, but he's somehow all leg) but they are especially tantalizing in this outfit. The thick of his thigh is hugged just so by his shorts and for so much to be exposed... Dimitri sucks in a breath.
He reaches his hands out to beckon Felix back.] Come here.
[ Though he doesn't look at Dimitri, he feels the weight of his gaze upon him. Hears reverence dripping from his words. "Goddess, you are gorgeous." It takes all of his will not to shudder, and burst into flames like the fire crackling behind him still.
Even when his king beckons him, he can't meet his eye. Felix swallows the lump in his throat. ] Had enough already? [ He knows that's not the case, though - which is why he doesn't return to the spot beside him. Instead, he half climbs into his lap. With a leg on one side of his body and a hand on his shoulder to steady himself, he feels his heart thunder in his chest as he anticipates something. What, he's not sure - but he doesn't seat himself fully on him to make it easier for Dimitri to move him, if he pleases. ]
Never. [Felix climbs over him and Dimitri draws his hand up the leg that comes to his side. He follows that line of muscle he loves so much, fingers dipping into the divot up to Felix's knee and then to his thigh. He squeezes when his hand finds the curve of his ass, just below it. All the while, his other hand is steady on Felix's hip and he hasn't looked away from the man's face.]
If I'd had it my way, you would have only ever danced for me.
[ No matter how much time passes, Felix isn't sure he'll ever get used to this side of Dimitri. Of course he knows it exists - he's guilty of riling him up in the past, goading him into biting up his pale skin in a flurry of possessiveness. But the deep tone in his voice, coupled with that hand on his ass, makes Felix suck in a breath all the same. ]
... Byleth wouldn't have liked that. [ The thought of Dimitri staring at him, wanting him even during the war (and their school days?) is a lot. He's aware he's pink to his ears, and that his blush is beginning to spread to his neck, but he still bunches his hand in the fabric of his shirt and finally looks down. ] But we're the only ones here right now.
[(dimitri may have been wrapped up in revenge during their school days, but he was not immune to his teenage hormones that kicked into overdrive whenever he caught sight of felix dancing for their house. he was very guilty of staring and wanting)
But Felix is right. They're the only ones here right now, in the privacy of Dimitri's room, only the flickering flames of the fireplace to witness them. He moves swiftly, without a sound, pulling Felix out of his standing position and dropping him back down onto the couch.
There he settles between Felix's legs, hiking one over his shoulder.] That we are. [He kisses below his knee.] You're mine now.
[ Like this, Felix has no choice but to look up into his lover's hungry eye. It burns brighter than the fireplace, zeroing in on him like he's the only person in the world.
He hooks his knee over his shoulder and draws Dimitri closer, ready to burn with him. ] Yeah. I'm yours.
[With that, that silent permission, Dimitri turns his gaze away to focus on Felix's leg. He kisses down his thigh, a line to the edge of Felix's short with a couple stray kisses littered near the soft underside of his thigh.
He nuzzles into a particularly soft spot, kissing, nosing into it, and then he bites. He scrapes his teeth across skin, lets his teeth leave an imprint before going in to suck a bruise into Felix's skin.]
[ Felix's breath hitches, melting into a low groan as he works a bruise onto his thigh. He threads a hand loosely in Dimitri's hair and lets his head fall back naturally. Wasting no time at all, really - but neither of them have ever been the type to hold back with each other, once the floodgates opened and they allowed themselves to feel freely.
He curses under his breath, tugging on his hair when the pressure teeters on overwhelming. ] Dimitri...
[Dimitri doesn't fight him. He detaches with that tug, licking a stripe over his new mark. It's dark; he's rather proud of it. But he doesn't say a word, only looks up at Felix through one half-lidded eye. What happens next is Felix's call.]
[ Felix, too, doesn't say a word. He simply shifts underneath him, draping his other leg over his shoulder and leaving the first to hook around his side loosely. Hopefully, Dimitri gets the hint. ]
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And with that, it all makes sense. While Felix would never admit it, it's clear that that's all he's ever wanted. To have something for himself, be his own person. He's always tried to claw his way out from Glenn, Rodrigue, and even Dimitri's own shadow.
Dimitri drops the other's wrist and his own hand falls to his side.] I understand. Again, I apologize. I'll leave.
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Wait. [ Felix reaches for his wrist, but stops short. His hand clenches into a fist. ] You stay. I'll leave.
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[He steps closer to Felix and presses a chaste kiss to his lips. Light. Reassuring.] Come to my bedroom when you're done?
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Felix nods quietly ] Fine. ... I'll see you soon. [ and waits for Dimitri to take his leave and for silence to overtake the training hall before picking up where he left off in his routine. The rhythm feels all wrong and his mind keeps wandering further and further with each pirouette, but even if it's just practice, even if it's for himself, he's not leaving this unfinished.
Around half an hour later, he keeps to his word and knocks on the door to Dimitri's bedroom. ] Open up. [ He's still in the dancer outfit (if he's staying the night in his room, he can just borrow his clothes. it wouldn't be the first time he's done that.) but he has a long cloak wrapped around his body to hide most of it, and to keep him warm. ]
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Get inside; the fireplace is already going. [He moves aside for Felix. When Felix is safe inside, he starts pulling blankets from his bed so they can cozy up by the fire.]
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It was easier to come straight here. [ He also didn't want to keep Dimitri waiting too long.
Watching the fire dance before his eyes, he takes a seat on the couch (and leaves plenty of room for Dimitri to settle next to him). ] Listen. I want to apologize for before. When I got mad at you, I let my emotions get the better of me. [ It's not always easy for him to say sorry, but he at least recognizes when he should. ]
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Regardless... He takes his place next to Felix without a word and follows suit in wrapping himself in blankets. After Felix has his say, Dimitri lays his hand atop Felix’s smaller one.]
Thank you. But I think your anger was justified. I lingered - [No, that’s not it.] watched you for far too long. [He rubs his index finger over Felix’s knuckle and down the knobby slope of his thumb, willing some warmth into their hands.] You rarely do anything without purpose, so if you went out of your way to do something alone I should have known better and respected that.
[He, too, can own up to his mistakes.]
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He turns his hand beneath Dimitri's, letting their fingers lace together naturally. ] At least it was you who saw, not one of the others. [ He can still look Dimitri in the eye, which is more than he could say if it were anyone else. ]
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I - we can make sure it stays that way. [We, not I, because Dimitri is not possessive. No. Of course he isn't.] I suppose your quarters are too small to dance in; that's why you went to the training grounds, yes? We must have an empty room here that can be set up for you...
[Or.] Or, you could dance here. [If the furniture is pushed out of the way, the lounge space connected to Dimitri's bedroom (where they are now) should be sufficient.] I would leave you be, of course. You need only say the word.
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Are you sure? [ Yes, they're together, and Dimitri is infuriatingly kind-hearted sometimes, but something about his offer makes his heart squeeze in his chest. ]
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[No one is going to enter his room without his explicit permission. Or is Felix concerned with kicking Dimitri out of his own room?]
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He squeezes his hand and takes a slow, deep breath. ] I'll take you up on that. [ Though Dimitri can't see it from this angle, Felix smiles, warmth tickling his cheeks. ] Thank you, Dimitri.
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[A comfortable silence falls over them then. Dimitri can only just hear Felix’s quiet breathing over the crackle of the fire. In a perfect world, Dimitri would be able to fall asleep like this. Unfortunately sleep still alludes him even when he’s at his most relaxed, as he is now. It might have something to do with how he can still see just a peek of Felix’s dancer outfit underneath all their blankets. The collar is very much visible, it leads Dimitri’s eye down to Felix’s collarbone. He can feel his bare legs against his own.]
May I make a request? [He breaks the silence.] May I see you? N-not dance. [He clarifies quickly.] I just want to get a good look at you.. in the outfit.
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Felix lets out a small huff, but he lifts himself from Dimitri's shoulder without a protest. ] Fine. I suppose I can let you see it. [ He releases Dimitri's hand and leaves the blankets on the couch as he steps in front of him. With the heat of the fire at his back, he rests his hands on his hips and looks off to the side. ] Just don't take too long - this isn't very warm, you know. [ If that wasn't obvious from how much lean, muscular skin's exposed right now. ]
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[Dimitri's eye is still drawn to Felix's legs though. His legs pull him in like a magnet. And Dimitri has always really liked Felix's legs (the man is small, but he's somehow all leg) but they are especially tantalizing in this outfit. The thick of his thigh is hugged just so by his shorts and for so much to be exposed... Dimitri sucks in a breath.
He reaches his hands out to beckon Felix back.] Come here.
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Even when his king beckons him, he can't meet his eye. Felix swallows the lump in his throat. ] Had enough already? [ He knows that's not the case, though - which is why he doesn't return to the spot beside him. Instead, he half climbs into his lap. With a leg on one side of his body and a hand on his shoulder to steady himself, he feels his heart thunder in his chest as he anticipates something. What, he's not sure - but he doesn't seat himself fully on him to make it easier for Dimitri to move him, if he pleases. ]
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If I'd had it my way, you would have only ever danced for me.
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... Byleth wouldn't have liked that. [ The thought of Dimitri staring at him, wanting him even during the war (and their school days?) is a lot. He's aware he's pink to his ears, and that his blush is beginning to spread to his neck, but he still bunches his hand in the fabric of his shirt and finally looks down. ] But we're the only ones here right now.
[ So have at him. ]
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But Felix is right. They're the only ones here right now, in the privacy of Dimitri's room, only the flickering flames of the fireplace to witness them. He moves swiftly, without a sound, pulling Felix out of his standing position and dropping him back down onto the couch.
There he settles between Felix's legs, hiking one over his shoulder.] That we are. [He kisses below his knee.] You're mine now.
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He hooks his knee over his shoulder and draws Dimitri closer, ready to burn with him. ] Yeah. I'm yours.
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He nuzzles into a particularly soft spot, kissing, nosing into it, and then he bites. He scrapes his teeth across skin, lets his teeth leave an imprint before going in to suck a bruise into Felix's skin.]
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He curses under his breath, tugging on his hair when the pressure teeters on overwhelming. ] Dimitri...
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Dimitri kisses along the blank canvas he has been presented and he's no gentler when he bites into the flesh of Felix's thigh this time.]
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